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I am challenging myself to be more consistent Here's why

For the next 31 days I am challenging myself to do what I said I am going to do. To some this may sound like cake work but for me it is not. I am an artist. I have finally become comfortable saying it and standing in all that comes with it. I am occasionally flighty, and more days than not I am inconsistent. I change my mind often and don't show up when I should. I am not always this way and these are not all of the qualities I possess, however I am self aware enough to acknowledge that this is a part of me that needs work, so I have chosen today to put the effort and time into starting the work. 

I won't lie, I'm nervous. I feel vulnerable, like I'm taking my socks off in front of people and I don't remember if I lotioned my feet or painted my toes. I'm going for it though! 

I have been doing some major self work over the past few years, and I feel like I've grown tremendously. I've faced some major issues like addiction to external validation, and sex. I've learned that I don't have to prove myself to anyone, and that choosing myself first is the best love I can give myself and everyone around me. Those were huge and took up some major time and space, I should be able to conquer this with ease. 

That being said this is still a judgement free zone. If I say this today and don't show up tomorrow grant me grace. This is my real life, I am only trying to live, be great and leave something magical for the people who come after me, it's not like those are major goals or anything, not like if I don't accomplish them the world as I know it will crumble and I will be forgotten forever! Incase you don't know me personally that is sarcasm and my actual thoughts are Please Hold Me Accountable Friend! I want this to work badly! My life and the lives of countless others depend on me growing and maturing and creating!



Here's a list of things I am attempting to be more consistent at. 

1. Writing something everyday...

I want to go down in history as one of the greatest writers of all time. I want to be read and remembered for thousands of years. Right now I'm a novice at best. I have taken a couple of classes and I keep a diary and journal. I've written a couple of books just to see if I could, but nothing I would consider as good as some of my favorite artists. To reach the place I see for myself I have to practice, and that means writing more... aka consistently every day!

2. Posting to social media

Some people may disagree but I love social media. I think it is the best thing to ever happen to the world for artists and creatives and people in any industry that previously had a door that was controlled by someone's opinion. I need it to find and connect with my audience. I know that there are people out there who will love my thoughts, opinions and art, but if I don't let them know I exist by posting to social media consistently how will they ever find me?

3. Caring for my mind, body, and spirit 

Having kids changed me. I used to be all about selfcare. I got my hair, nails, toes and eyebrows done every two weeks. I had a gym membership that I used faithfully. I made sure there was no extra hair on any are of my body twice per week and smelled of some fruity powdery mix always! Now days I brush my teeth, and am sure to wash my face and butt with two different towels daily. That's about it. I don't stink, but I don't do much else to care for my body. I try to read a book a month, but I've been slacking for a while. I have been pretty consistent with my prayer and meditation practice it is what has kept me sane through all of this self work, but I would like to be even more consistent. 

I recently turned 40 and the vision of the woman I want to be in my 40's is much cooler than the reality right now. To get where I'm going you guessed it... I have to be more consistent in caring for my body. 

4. Communicating with Family and Friends

As if I don't have enough on my plate already being consistent with myself and my needs, I now want to be more consistent with others. Yep. I want to. I have been so caught up taking care of myself and figuring things out that I have put off all of the people around me. I have done everything from not calling my sisters back for months to not showing up for my kids report card night. I know I have to give myself time and space and I am ok with that, the part that I want to work on is consistently communicating. I hurt people by not saying anything at all. I feel selfish and yep inconsistent. The people around me love me and will always be there for me no matter what. I have to be more consistent with being there for them as well even if it is just with a text or a quick call. 


There's more but for now these are at the top of my list. My MAY projects. If you have any advice for me, things that help you stay consistent, books I might like, a kick in the butt to keep me accountable or better yet some encouraging words, leave them in the comments below or find me out in the world and chat with me instagram @philenam tiktok @philenaliving or on Facebook (I am 40 so yes I'm still over there!) Philena Moaning-Alford.


Thanks for reading, I'll see you in the next one! 

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